We notice that we all miss the TV, and yet we all acknowledge that we would do less creative, active, cuddly stuff together when the TV is on. We miss our shows, but we would also be missing really good connective time together if we were watching our shows.
In some ways, the TV definitely separates us, even if we’re sitting on the couch together.
TV also enables us to waste a lot of productive time in non-productive ways. Today is a perfect example. I’m briefly home for work and I have about 45 minutes to spare. I have a couple of errands to run (post office, bank, return the printer ink). But if I were watching TV I’d probably just sit down and watch some ESPN, news, or recorded shows from the DVR. And while this is definitely not bad, it’s also not all that productive. At the end of the day, my errands wouldn’t have been accomplished, but I would have watched another 30 minutes of repeated highlights or a recap about what people are tweeting about the Political Debate – for the 14th time. I also wouldn’t be typing this, or any of the other ideas I tell myself I need to get around to pursuing. 
Tonight Kara said “I didn’t even think about watching TV today.” She was reading in bed.
Today is Mardi Gras Day in New Orleans and it’s a perfect 70 degrees! Our family has been out celebrating at parades for 3 straight days, and catching stuff together for the vast majority of the past 2 weeks. We love it! With so much activity TV hasn’t been such a big deal. We also had family members in town, and they were actually glad to get a few days of vacation from TV. They commented that several of our great discussions wouldn’t have happened with the TV on.
And though this blog has focused on our family’s use of TV and experience without TV for the past 21 days, I’d like to broaden the topic for this post to include media in general. (I’ll be a bit circuitous, but I’ll make my point). Right now I’d like to be watching the end of Mardi Gras on TV. But truth be told, I don’t have to watch it on TV because I have multiple vantage points available to me right here, on this device on which I’m typing, the internet-enabled computer or wi-fi device. I can literally watch it all in the palm of my hand – as long as my smart-phone is still in place. And I noticed out at the parades just how much time people are spending on their phones: reading, texting, surfing, posting, updating, checking, etc. Most aren’t talking – they’re interfacing in a less personal way. But they are definitely distracted from their present company. Several times my own kids asked to play a game on my phone – something inane like Papi Jump or Temple Run. And it all got me thinking about the role of media and media devices in my children’s lives. TV won’t be their issue. I doubt that they will actually sit in front of television sets in the way that we know them today. They won’t be observers of TV; they’ll be participants in media. And limiting that participation, if indeed it needs to be limited, will be the challenge of their day. We have trouble turning the TV off and putting our phones down, but how will they limit their participation in media production and consumption? That will be their issue.
Constantly using media allows you to engage a host of folks and information, but often disconnects you from your immediate surroundings and compatriots. It means you’re no longer present here and now. That’s the problem as I see it, and staying present while limiting media consumption will the issue of the next generation. Our job is to train them how. We’ve got to help them practice putting down the devices and being present with each other.
Here’s something that wouldn’t happen if we were watching TV. Tonight, after our two younger sons were asleep, Kara and I were reading in our bed. Our oldest son was awake and asked if he could read with us. So the 3 of us lay together on our bed, each silently reading their own book. It was actually a really nice moment together that we’ve never shared before.
